The Football-Files I: Bafana Bafana's Bloody Agents

BA=AB

No, this is not a maths lesson. BA=AB is something Pansy learnt on Timeslive.

It is true, the standard of their journalism is often-times "dodji", but Pansy doesn't read Timeslive for journalism's sake. For that purpose she has the Mail and Guardian. Pansy reads Timeslive for the reader comments.

The comments can be truly entertaining, witty and even educational.

A recent article "40 South Africanisms you should know" inspired some very amusing comments from readers. The all-time classic was "Terminator"=domestic worker, because they terminate your household appliances.

Another good one was "bloody agent"= someone who doesn't support Bafana Bafana.*

In other words, Bloody Agent=AntiBafana Bafana or BA=AB.

(Dear reader, if you don't know the "bloody agent" story, look it up on you tube)

Pansy didn't start out as a bloody agent. There was a time when she was feeling it. Verily, verily, she watched the world cup draw at Dros. But ever since Ballack got injured (the curse of the number 13 jersey), the world cup lost its lustre.

But even with Ballack's injury, she wasn't a bloody agent. Pansy was branded a bloody agent by a colleague who couldn't fathom:

-Why Pansy didn't want to watch the Bafana Bafana game on the 22nd at the Monte Fan Park

- Why she wasn't doing "Football Friday" and wearing a Bafana Bafana shirt

-Why she didn't order a Bafana Bafana shirt (which they could get free from work, so Pansy was going to get one and then give it away, but Pansy didn't want to pay tax on it, and they took so long to arrive that Pansy cancelled her order)

-Why she didn't buy SA flags for her car.

And then said colleague ended this interrogation by mocking the sporting prowess of Pansy's motherland.

B-A-D M-O-V-E.

Without going into the details of Pansy's response, she gently reminded said colleague that Bafana Bafana are only playing because SA is hosting the tournament, and that other African countries excel in other sports, despite having much less resources than South Africa.

So that is the story of how and why Pansy was branded a B.A.

Just for the sake of being a contrarian (and vexing her colleague) Pansy pointed out that BAs are not altogether BAd. Anyway, these days it's all about BAlance. The BAs will keep the economy going when everyone else is watching soccer -they will go shopping and they will hold the fort at the office.

*the nickname for the South African men's soccer team. It means: "The lads"